For most of my life I have known exactly what I wanted to be; a teacher. I have chopped and changed that idea and added on and off other occupations but a teacher, nonetheless is what I have always dreamed of one day becoming. Today I was in class (set-planning) and I was asked to write a description of what I wanted to be and why. I wrote the usual; a teacher for early childhood or a journalist for a lifestyle magazine. Then I thought about the why ... and I thought ... and I thought. Why do I want to be a teacher? Is it because I have seen so many romantic old movies and read romantic old books and the characters I admire are teachers? Or is it because I actually want to be one? I have pondered over this for some time and I have come to the conclusion that I no longer have any idea what I want to be when I leave school! Me!! The person who has her whole life planned and who has always known, since she was but a child, what she wished to do! I am not used to this feeling of ignorance at what the future might hold for my career. Ever since I can remember I have always had something in mind. I feel quite lost. Indeed, I feel I cannot rest until I know.
Who, you may ask, are the mysterious book/movie characters which have so heavily influenced my wanting to be a teacher. Well, there is the lovely Anne from Anne of Green Gables. There is the delightful Laura from Little House on the Prairie. There is Jo from Little Women. There, I cannot think of any more but I am sure there are countless still.
I don't know why they have influenced me so but I have always dreamed that a teacher would be such a romantic and rewarding job. I have to remind myself though that we are in a new day and age now and perhaps teaching is not quite so romantic as it used to be. Or maybe it is simply the fact that these are only stories. Life is not without sin and unpleasant situations. I have to keep reminding myself that stories choose only to have things happen when they are supposed to. All things are planned and have a purpose in a novel.
Well, I suppose I shall know some day. When that day will be I simply don't know.
Miss Aalyn xx